from
Sea Star,
released February 1, 2017
FT thierry michel on flute (low whistle)
Re-released on International Women’s Day 2022 on the all-female #BreakTheBias album with Poetry NI / Rancid Idols:
rancididols.bandcamp.com/album/breakthebias
IWD 2022. UNCONSCIOUS BIAS:
Abuse of women is difficult to investigate, even harder to prove. Most invisible is unconscious abuse.. How can we recognise cruelty when the perpetrator appears to be helping the victim? And when he believes he is helping? The violence is completely unconscious.
The harm however is real, and the isolation of the victim is profound, as no one would believe that her caring protector is hurting her - not even her and least of all, him. Sophisticated gaslighting and manipulation fly below the radar of both.
Women are tortured in plain sight, with no explanation other than she is tying herself to a stake. The burning times never ended, they were just pushed out of mind. The crowds didn’t go away, they are hungry for a show.
Denial of our deep-seated hatred of women increases the brutality of unconscious attacks. Making our misogyny conscious frees women from harm. It is not easy work, requiring bravery and humility. Men have this courage if they care enough to dig deep. I thank those that do.
Intensive psychoanalysis uncovered the unconscious dynamic of harm in my marriage. Intergenerational trauma. My suffering was concealed by a performance of happiness. But in silence one day I sat at the piano and improvised this piece, ‘Forgive Ness Monster’.
Thank you for listening.
Forgiveness is letting go of your desire for justice in respect of your need for peace. When the stakes are so high that you lose your sanity and fear for your life, forgiveness is crucial self care.
Stay breathing - even in isolation and humiliation - ignore the crowd and slowly untie yourself from thousands of years of misogyny.